Today's Topic - Worry

I once heard that if you have one foot in the future and one foot in the past, your pissing on today.  We worry about two things; not getting what we want or losing what we have.  That takes us out of the present moment. Most things we worry about almost never happen.  Worry give us anxiety that, in turn takes away from our peace.

Worry is like fear, it's not real but I think we've all thought about something we fear, played the tape out, and made it become so real that we actually have a physically and emotional reaction as if it's happening. I call that crazy making.

There's a scene in Silver Linings Playbook about a song that reminds the character of catching his wife in the shower with the history teacher and every time the song plays, he is pulled back into that moment of insanity. It's just a song, it's not real. Breathe... It's just a song.

Today's Topic - Toxic People

This needs to be on my mirror as a daily reminder.  We've all had toxic people in our lives and for me it's been a pattern with friends and men. Being an only child, I've always valued my friends like family and hung onto the toxic ones much longer than I should have.  Saying goodbye is hard but hanging onto someone who is toxic is much more painful.

I call these people my "noble friends". They are great teachers in our lives if we are willing to look at the lesson.  These people don't show up by accident; they show up to teach us. Each time we able to recognize something in ourselves that needs healing, that's one less layer of junk we carry.

These people will continue to show up until we learn the lesson whether that be self love, self respect, boundaries, courage, strength, etc. If someone doesn't bring out the best in you, bottom line, cut em' loose. Be willing to look at the lesson they are there to teach you.

Somewhere out there is a saying, if you die with one friend at your funeral that REALLY had your back, you were successful. And so it is.

We are all in this together! Let's be strong and love ourselves more.

Today's Topic - Gratitude

 Gratitude is the best way to get unstuck from any situation. If you been disappointed or let down by either a person or circumstance of life shifting to gratitude is key to happiness and peace. We know that if we focus on gets bigger. I like to shift gratitude for the simple things like being able to walk and use my legs, my health because without my health I have nothing to give.

Disappointment is an opportunity to shift into gratitude and and try things differently. It's an opportunity to reevaluate the people in our lives too. Are the people in our lives supporting us or taking from us? Are they lifting us or pulling us down? What is good in your life today? What miracles are happening in your life today? What opportunity are you faced with today?

Today is new day to make new choices, new boundaries, new gratitude list. Today is a new day to choose happiness over circumstances or people we have no control. Today is a new beginning to reset and be better then we were yesterday.

Today's Topic - Loving Yourself

Does it sound arrogant to say I love myself more than anyone else in the world and I take care of myself first because when I'm good, everything around me is good.  Maybe it does, but we get what we give and if we are giving less love to ourselves we are settling for less love from others.

Retraining our minds to say positive things to ourselves takes practice and discipline especially if we've been caught up in negative thinking of ourselves. I went through a phase where I was trying to pass my Real Estate test and kept failing. I found myself calling myself stupid and a piece of shit, I had those thoughts long enough that I literally got physically sick.

We don't realize the power of the words we say to ourselves, but powerful they are. Do whatever it takes to learn to love yourself and speak highly of yourself. If we don't speak highly of ourselves, how can we expect others to speak highly of us?

We are human and we are not perfect. We make mistakes and hopefully we learn from them. Beating ourselves to a pulp doesn't erase the mistake, forgiving ourselves reminds us to be gentle with ourselves.

Love yourself as much as you want to be loved. Practice, practice, practice.

Today's Topic - Transition

Change is situational, transition on the other hand is psychological. It's not the events but rather the inner reorientation or self-redefinition that we have to go through in order to incorporate any of these changes into our lives. Without transition, a change is just a rearrangement of the furniture. Unless transition happens, the change won't work, because it doesn't "take".

I think this is why so many of us get stuck.  On the surface it sounds so simple and nonchalant, but the real change comes from digging deep enough that you actually feel a shift in your being. It's not easy and it's not for everyone. I also believe that transition takes place in layers. If we uncovered all of our trauma and issues at the same time we would freak out. It's a process that cannot be rushed.

When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.

Today's Topic - Trust Your Gut

Right? How many times have we ignored the signs, red flags, gut instinct?  Usually it goes something like this, we want something so bad that we choose denial over our gut feeling and later get our asses kicked.

How many times have you said to yourself, "I had a feeling, I knew better"? I know I've been down that road many times and had to deal with the consequences.  I guess we can either listen or learn because our intuition is our compass, it's God guiding us.

We not always get what we want but how about we trust the process maybe, just maybe, God has something better in store for us?  This is a little something I continue to work on and wanted to bring it to the forefront.

My mantra for the day, "My intuition is my friend and always guiding me in the best direction that serves my highest good."

Today's Topic - Confidence

Our hearts are always honest while our heads tend to play the role of the trickster. Confidence lives in our hearts because that's where the truth lies. We can build confidence by listening to our hearts.

I know for me, my mind has tried to keep me stuck for years.  It's messed with my confidence to a point where I've wanted to give up on my dreams and passions but my heart always sends me the same message; "don't give up, your on the right track, be brave, be confident."

God gave each and every one of us a gift that only we have. Something that we can do better then anyone else and it's up to us to tap into that gift.  There lies the confidence we yearn for and when we hit the mark the sky's the limit. Until, then fake it till you find it.

Today's Topic - Dealing with PTSD

Not everyone talks about the struggles they are going through. Many people are ashamed of their struggles. We think of them as weakness.  We are human and to struggle is human whether it's a mental, physical, or psychological struggle.

The PTSD I deal with comes from my days doing drugs and staying up all night. I tend to panic when I'm up late anymore. I have accepted it I honor it. It's all I can do because it is what it is. Sometimes I feel that people think I'm boring but they don't know what I've been through and taking care of my mental health is more important than being liked.

I take care of myself by not eating too much sugar or alcohol, especially before bed because it gives me anxiety. I don't go to events that keep me up late and sometimes that makes me feel bad but my mental health is more important than pleasing others.

When we take care of ourselves first and do what serves our highest good, the world around us is better. The people who really love us will understand and the others, well, does it really matter at the end of the day if they judge us or think we are boring? Not really. We can be proud that we love ourselves enough to know our limits and honor our well being. That's what matters.

Today's Topic - Know Your Worth

People can tell us over and over how smart, beautiful, creative, we are but until it resonates inside of us, we can't feel what other people see in us. Knowing your worth starts with being a little more gentle with yourself.  We are our worse critics and we have to stop doing that to ourselves.

We are all worthy of love, money, and health no matter what we've done in the past to make us feel different of that. However, we don't get there without working for it.  Some of us have deep seeded believe systems that we are not enough, we don't deserve wealth or love so it's up to us to recreate that belief system.

The more ingrained it is, the more work we need to do but it's possible. Pick the one thing you need or want the most and write a great affirmation as if you already have it. Post it where you will see it every day. Say it out loud every day until you feel a shift. Don't give up, it's just an affirmation. Just because you can't see it doesn't mean the Universe isn't working on it on your behalf.

We are all in this together!! Give someone the compliment you wish they would give to you because you get what you give.

Today's Topic - Exploring New Things

I used to be afraid of trying new things for fear that I would be laughed at or made fun of.  That is no way to live.  Trying new things expands us, it makes us realize we can do things we never thought we could and that gives us confidence.

Do we trip along the way?  I know I do and have, but that's the fun of it. Releasing the need for perfection gives us the permission to explore new things with excitement, not fear. Only then are we free to all the facets of who we are and who we can become.

Mistakes and stumbling is part of the journey.  Once we realize that what else is there to be afraid of?

Today's Topic - Forgiveness

To not forgive someone is like taking poison every day expecting them to die. That includes us. Forgiveness doesn't mean they're off the hook for what they did; it means we are no longer willing to carry the heavy burden of resentments towards them. When we forgive we set ourselves free.

There's an exercise I've done over the years that helps. Write the person a letter, feel every emotion you have for that person, then outside in a safe place burn the piece of paper while you affirm you forgive them. You may have to do this exercise a few times but eventually you will feel lighter.

Being "willing" is the first step to forgiveness. Willing to forgive others and especially ourselves. Once we are willing, miracles happen. Anger and resentments are a process of emotions but to harbor them too long, now they start to effect us, our health and well being.

Forgiveness is the road to happiness and peace- one day a time, one letter at a time, being willing one day at a time.

Today's Topic - Living Your Truth

I have felt misunderstood many times in my life simply because people don't take the time to really get to know people. People believe rumors and run with them. That's one of the harsh realities of life. I used to and still do to some degree want people to understand me but I've realized that, at the end of the day it doesn't matter. People are people and they do what they do.

Quality is more important than quantity. How many friends we have on Facebook doesn't determine our popularity and it doesn't determine our worth. We don't have to be understood, we just get to have the courage to live our truth no matter what they say because at the end of life, he who dies with the most toys and friends isn't the point.

What matters is that we live our truth, we live our best life, we live being kind to others, we live a our lives being the change we want to see in the world. We work on being the best version of ourselves. We do the  best we can to learn from our mistakes. We overcome our challenges and become a person we are proud of.

Today's Topic - Saying NO

Why is it so many of us have such a hard time saying no? I caught myself cancelling an event I said I would go to and following it up with a lie as to why.  I caught myself and deleted that part of the text and simply said, "Something came up". I don't have to explain myself, it's my life, my choice.

Saying yes when we really mean no creates resentments and anxiety for us. Why do we do that to ourselves? Well, I think we all want to be liked and loved; at least that's been the case for me. Practicing saying no is healthy and empowering for us. It reminds us that we are in control of our choices and the things we choose to do. Others may not like it when we start to say no but they don't have to. It's a healthy boundary we are practicing for ourselves and for our happiness.

Today's Topic - Challenging Yourself

Life has a way of pushing us when we need to grow.  Sometimes we stay in situations because they are familiar and comfortable but not necessarily good for us. The fear can paralyze us in to trying new things but at some point, if we are suppose to be growing we have the choice to push ourselves or God will push us and remind us that we can fly.

Growth isn't easy, it's very uncomfortable but always worth it. Isn't it liberating to look back on something you've gone through and, at the time you felt like you would never get through it?  But you did. We are so much stronger than we think we are, we are more amazing than we give ourselves credit for.

Recognizing those victories of growth is so important because we can all get stuck in feeling like we're not moving but we are. Journaling is a great way to monitor our progress. I look back on journals I've written and am surprised and things I've overcome. We forget and lose faith in our strength sometimes.

I invite you to challenge yourself with something you've been scared and uncomfortable to do. Self reflect on the things you have pushed through and give credit where credit is due. Celebrate your awesomeness!

Today's Topic - Balance

I did a little workshop yesterday and discovered that I need more fun & leisure in my life. I also found myself resisting when I was writing a goal to have more fun & leisure. If you were to write out the five areas in your life, then rate them 1-10 what would that look like for you?

1) Health
2) Money
3) Home
4) Relationships
5) Career

I invite you to do your own rating and see where you might be out of balance. This can vary depending on what's going on in your life. Balance is not always easy but a goal worth shooting for. Taking care of ourselves, then others is the key to having balance.

Today's Topic - Miracles

What you focus on gets bigger. It's the Law of Attraction, the Law of Universe. The Secret has been out for many years and many of us know this information but we forget.  We forget and get caught up in thoughts that don't serve our highest good.

As if we don't have enough to do on the daily, we now get to pay attention to our thoughts but if we want change we had the same thinking for years, we have to retrain our brain. I'm pretty sure it's impossible to control every random thought that runs through our minds. At least it is for me but the control we do have is replacing negative thoughts with positive ones.

If we really really want something it takes so much discipline of thought and action every day. Being mindful of thoughts and making sure we are taking at least one small step in the direction we want to go is key to dreams becoming reality.

Think of it as cleansing the mind like you would cleanse your body. Cleanse the mind of any negative thoughts. Write down one simple daily thought and keep it in your car, on your mirror, anywhere you will see it every day and be reminded of the positive.

This is a little something I'm working on. I hope it helps you too.

Today's Topic - Fear

When my husband and I decided to move to Arizona, I was terrified. I had lived in many places and never been afraid to just pick up and go or jump in & out of relationships but with that came extreme consequences.

I really had to think about why I wanted to move and make sure that I was doing it for the right reasons. Most my reasons for moving in the past was because I was running. Now, in my mid 40's I wasn't up to have to recover from another bad choice.

We made the move, it's not been sunshine and lollipops every step of the way. Life will always happen on life's terms no matter where we are but I didn't run, I walked. That made all the difference.

Deep down in our knowing, the answers are always there. We just second guess ourselves because, for some of us, we've confused our intuition with the material world and make mistakes. Trust your gut always, it's God guiding you.

Today's Topic - Taking Action

Dreaming is the easy part but without action the dreams will never manifest. Taking action scares the hell out of me but not so long ago I had an epiphany and felt like I broke though a wall. I wrote my goals down and besides the goal, I wrote the action down. Every day I look at my goal and the actions I HAVE to take if I want to reach my goals.

I have to make myself do the action every day whether that's working out to get the result I want, going out in the world and meeting new people so I can get more clients. Sometimes I don't feel like and sometimes I don't do it but I do my best to stay focused on the prize.

Today's Topic - Taking The High Road

The only thing we really have control over is how we react to any situation. It's hard when someone is mean or downright rude not to have that knee jerk reaction back at them but to not respond puts the fire out.

I know for me, the times I've reacted to someone cutting me off in traffic or doing something rude, it has escalated the situation. Road rage is a perfect example; people die in those situations just by reacting.  For that split second the rage & ego kick in causing people to do & say things they can't take back. It's dangerous.

Taking the high road means taking accountability for ourselves and behavior and, in the end it's always love that wins.

Today's Topic - Friday's

I got a kick out of the quote.  Friday's we get to celebrate getting through what can, at times be a long week. We get the weekend to play, relax, regroup. Celebrating the victories of the week no matter how small they may seem is really important.

 I know for me, sometimes I feel like the hamster stuck on the wheel but when I reflect on the accomplishments & victories I had throughout the week there's always something awesome to celebrate. Something challenging I was able to push through.

Have a fabulous weekend & celebrate your awesomeness!

Today's Topic - Patience

Patience is so not my area... I've always struggled with this one because I'm such a "need to know" person. Probably why it's been one of the hardest lessons and one that shows up over and over.

What I've learned about patience is that it's about trusting the process of life.  Trusting that God has a plan and it will all be ok. So, what to do when you lingering in patience? Being proactive and focusing on other things that I can control helps me.

Patience also gives us time to rethink what we want. Sometimes we can think we know what we want but the Universe gives us time to rethink and make new choices. I learned that one from The Secret.

We are never alone when we are in the lesson patience. I think it's a big one for many of us so what the hell, we're all in it together.  Let's work this patience thing together so we can remind ourselves that it's all going to be ok.

Today's Topic - Surrender

I'm constantly getting this lesson in my face but today I feel like I can actually let go. I can't control the outcome, I can't control other people, I can't control the weather and I'm not going to allow what I can't change to ruin my day.

I know God has a plan for me and it's better then the plan I have for myself. It feels great to realize that and know that if things don't work out the way I want them to, something better will. I get to trust that so I can just let go and enjoy "what is".

It's already written and I'll I have to do is show up. What a relief!

Today's Topic - New Day

Today is a new day, a day to reset, a day to have new goals. A day to be better then we were yesterday. A day to try something we've never tried before. A day to dream bigger then we allowed ourselves yesterday. Today is the present, a gift.

Today my intention is to be the best I can be and bring something new and better to the table that I didn't yesterday. Today I choose to vibrate in love no matter what. I choose to be kind no matter what. I choose to be the change in the world I want to see.

Today's Topic - Recovery

All of us are recovering from something and when we recover we discover new parts of ourselves we didn't know we had. We also discover our vulnerabilities that make us human. We are not alone on this journey, we may go through hard times at different times but we are never alone.

I suppose there's a time to recluse and reflect but at some point we all have to get up and get back in the game. Recover for me is an ongoing process and I'm the first one to admit that I have done the same things over and over expecting a different result which is the definition of insanity.

Having an accountability partner, someone who loves you enough to call you out on your shit, and reminds you that your stronger than you think you are is key if you are willing to open up to that option.

If you are currently in that space of unfamiliar, uncomfortable, and feeling broken, hang in there because you are about to discover a bigger part of yourself. Rebuilding and reshaping ourselves is a part of the process of recovery. We are the masterpiece of our own lives.

Today's Topic - Giving Back

Giving is the best way to get unstuck because we are first focused on helping others, not our own problems. I always feel my fullest when I'm giving or helping others. Knowing that you've changed even one life in a small way is the best gift one can give to themselves.

Giving is what brings us back to simple times. It makes us feel like we're contributing to something bigger then ourselves. We are on purpose when we're giving back. Giving back makes us feel worth while and happy.

Giving back doesn't have to be big. It can be as simple as holding a door open for someone, helping an elderly person load their groceries, letting someone go in front of us in traffic. It's the small things that make a difference.

Today's Topic - Perspective

Yesterday was a rough day. Nothing in particular happened but it was frustrations that had piled up that I felt helpless to change. I was angry and stuck in my shit. I drove to the store and as I pulled out of my neighborhood there was a girl on her bike. I didn't see her.

Then the thought ran through my mind, what if I'd hit her? That would have made what I thought was a bad day a really bad day. That put things into perspective for me and I realized that I was giving a situation so much of my power that I was allowing it to infect my day. It also made me realize that I wasn't really having a bad day after all. I have my health, my loved one, family and friends.

I'm grateful it was just a thought that helped me change my perspective and not something terrible that happened to change it. Things are never as bad as we make them out to be. It can always be worse. Practicing gratitude isn't always easy but staying stuck isn't either.

Today's Topic - Keep It Simple

We as women seem to think we have to conquer the world all in one day. No doubt we are strong and powerful women but we also have our breaking points. Learning to stop and slow down BEFORE we reach the breaking point is the key to happiness and peace. Knowing our limits and honoring them, knowing our strengths and celebrating them.

Rome wasn't built in one day and neither are our lives. Pausing to take care of ourselves is OK and essential to being the best we can be. Taking care of ourselves without feeling guilty for me, takes practice but why do we put guilt on ourselves because we need to take a time out?

The world won't fall apart if we don't get everything done in one day. We will fall apart if we don't learn to honor our limits, bodies, and emotional well being. Making ourselves #1 is the most important thing we can do for our lives.

Today's Topic - What's Meant To Be Will Be

I love this quote because it reminds me to take the action to make something happen but then release the outcome for two reasons. 1) I have no control over the outcome 2) If it's meant to be it will find a way.

How refreshing is that? We've showed up and taken the action; now we can take the day off and give our minds a rest knowing the Universe is working on it. We get to remind ourselves that it might show up a little different then we expect but however it shows up, it will always serve our highest good.

Deepak Chopra calls this The Law of Least Effort.  Taking the actions steps, then letting the Universe take over.

Today's Topic - Being Whole

The first time I heard this quote it was Jane Fonda who said, "We are not meant to be perfect, we are meant to be whole". To me, being whole is about being messy in life. The mistakes we make and learn from make us whole, never perfect.

The way I interpret being whole is by going through hardships in life that shape who we are and make us better people. If we were perfect we would never learn anything and honestly, what fun would that be? Yes, sometimes I want the easy button but I also love a challenge to test my strength so I can prove to myself what I'm made of. I'm stronger than I think I am.

Being whole is about being happy with the imperfections in ourselves. Being whole is about self acceptance.  Being whole is about loving the messy parts of ourselves that make us unique and different.

Today's Topic - Faith

Have faith and hurry up and wait, right? How cliche is that? However, having unwavering and blind faith is what makes miracles happen. Whatever your working on right now or waiting for, have faith that it's on the way and if it doesn't show up, something better will.

Have faith in yourself that your more than you think you are, your stronger than you think you are, your more capable than you think you are. Have faith that your on the right path, all the people in your life are there to teach you and inspire you. Have faith that your not alone in your fears, sadness, depression, anxiety. Big breathe, have faith- be at peace in that knowing.

Today's Topic - Carpe Diem

"Carpe Diem"- used to urge someone to make the most of the present time and give a little thought to the future.

Which is worse, taking risks and failing or doing nothing and living with regret? They say that failing is simply not trying and at the end of our lives, it's the risks we didn't take that we regret most. Not the failures and mistakes we made. Mistakes are part of growing and learning and once we realize that, it puts things into perspective.

What have you always wanted to do or try but been afraid? If you think about it and get excited about it, you may want to do it while you have the opportunity. Carpe Diem!